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What is Sexy?

What is sexy? Does that question conjure up images of thin, well toned, barely clad women?  That's what society has influenced us to think and to believe, but what is it really?  We're lead to believe that it's about how we look. 

I asked if I was sexy and I was told yes.  I asked what made me sexy and the list he gave included things I never thought about.  Things that are who I am, not how I look.  Then he asked, "don't you understand that?"  I had to answer no. 

I'd never thought about or considered what makes someone sexy is their mind, their heart, the kind things they do.  I'd been drinking the stereotypical cool-aid of the media, thinking that sexy was about being thin, having long hair and big boobs.  Go ahead and laugh, but the next time you're standing in a grocery store checkout line look at the magazines and tell me that's what sexy is portrayed as.

I've struggled with my body image for years, and while I think I'm winning one battle at a time, this is no easy war.

I tired of being labeled.  Curvy, "Plus size", and even overweight by a few healthcare professionals.  I'm a woman, a healthy woman. Could I stand to lose weight, maybe, but according to who's scale and at what price?

I'm tired. Tired of feeling bad about my body. Tired of talking about diets. Tired of talking about losing weight. Tired of hearing about other peoples food "issues" and diets". Tired of hearing people say "I can't eat this or that". Tired of feeling bad because I don't want to workout, give up certain foods and drop a size or three. Tired of thinking everyone is judging me because of how I look.

I'm 5'8" and I weight 206 pounds. I enjoy food, love desert and look forward to a good glass of wine.  I love this line from an article I read a while back - "The diet industry lives in an ocean of body negativity, twisted science, and behavioral Russian roulette".

If you desire is to change your lifestyle and your body to get healthier I'm all for it, but can we please stop talking about it all the time. There is more to life than the latest diet craze and the latest exercise routine.  I'll be honest, it's mentally taxing on everyone when the conversation is constantly about food restrictions.  It makes everyone uncomfortable when shame looks are shot at someone for eating the dessert you wish you were "allowed" to have in your restricted lifestyle.  And don't get me started on body shaming, it hurts to know so many women would rather tear each other apart than lift each other up.

Everyone has a judgment to pass on the statement above. Some might think "she should drop some weight" and some might think "I wish I was her". Here's the thing though, life is going to happen whether or not you're living it or waiting until you get back into those smaller jeans. 

Remeber Sexy is so much more than how you look.  What's your sexy?